EMAIL CORRESPONDANCE BETWEEN AVRIL LAVIGNE AND ME WHEN WE CO-WROTE THE LYRICS TO A SONG THAT WAS EVENTUALLY REJECTED BY HER LABEL (no grammatical or spelling corrections have been made so as to keep the accuracy of the exchange):

To: AvrilRulzToeTaLee@aol.com
From:TheAdwiz@aol.com
Subject: Hey
Date: July 22, 2003

Hey dude,

Ok, so I wanted to get this ball rolling, as they say. i'm truly psyched about us writing together. I have always been a fan of yours and this is such a humbling experience. OK. I will stop being such a nerd. Seriously. it's time to get reel.
Ok, this is what's been on my mind recently and I would love it if we could get the lyrics to reflect that. Boys, defintely boys. What can i say-i love 'em. LOL. Or should I say "boiz."
Pizza is abig one. I love pizza. Everyone loves pizza so maybe this is one to consider. Because everyone can relate to a song about pizza.
Fries, also. I love fries and everyone loves fries. But maybe with the whole France boycott, fries are controversial....or maybe that's even more of a reason to do it. Controversy sells music, right? Just look at R. Kelly (who is so hotttt!).
Politics? Nah. No one would believe I care about that. Besides doesn't Coldplay have a song about politics. We can't be copycats, now can we?
How about skateboards.....no, did that already.
I guess then pizza it is. Let me know what you think.

Luv,
Avril

To: AvrilRulzToeTaLee@aol.com
From: TheAdwiz@aol.com
Subject: Re: Hey
Date: July 22, 2003

Avril,

Great to hear from you. Saw you on TV the other night....I'm not sure if an Offspring t-shirt is ironic yet. You might want to think re-wearing that one in public.
Yeah, I'm pretty psyched about working with you, too. That night when we were doing shots together (shhh, I won't tell mom) was so fun. Someone your size can sure drink.
So....pizza, eh? I'm not sure if that's so compelling. I mean, it's just dough, tomato sauce and cheese. And girls nowadays are very conscious of their weight—they may resent a song about such a fattening dish. Best to rethink this one.
Here are some of my suggestions:
Emmanuel Kant - a great philosopher. Surely some of his works will inspire you.
Damien Hirst - look at some of his work. He always makes me think about things bigger than myself.
Chuck Close - closer inspection of his paintings will just give you an incredible window into the human psyche.
Miles Davis - granted, his music is cliche in its popularity but I'm sure you would really dig his vibe. It's about freeing your mind so you can fill in the spaces of the world.
I don't know—there's more. But start there with my list and we'll see where it goes.

Best,
Arye

To: TheAdwiz@aol.com
From:AvrilRulzToeTaLee@aol.com
Subject: Huh?
Date: July 22, 2003

A -

What the hell are you talking about? Cant? Hurst? Close? Who are these people? i looked them up on the internet and I don't get it....how could I relate to these people? They're not my peers. Has any of those people worked with the Matrix? No. Has any one of these people covered Metallica live for Metallica themself? No.
What I'm saying here, Arye, is that none of those "talk" to me or my sisters. or for that matter, my sistas. I need to channel Pink....Hillary duff...THE OLSON TWINS. ya feeling me dawg? LOL. Anyways, I've spokem to my mom and we think that we should sing about getting dumped and feeling lost. she says and she is sos os os os smart that we should sing about that stuff because most people get dumped and feel lost...except for me. i feel a bit wired from too much sugar and I've never been dumped because i'm easy. Tee heee. don't tell my mom about that.
SOOOOOOOOOOO...yeah,feeling lost and getting dumped - let me knw what you think.

KIT,
Av

To: AvrilRulzToeTaLee@aol.com
From: TheAdwiz@aol.com
Subject: Re: Huh?
Date: July 22, 2003

Ok...lost and dumped. Hmmm....sounds a bit better than pizza, I guess. Let me think.

Tell me what you think of when you imagine someone being dumped.

To: TheAdwiz@aol.com
From:AvrilRulzToeTaLee@aol.com
Subject: Dude
Date: July 22, 2003

Dude,

Not my job. You're writing the lyrics here. you're the one who gets dumped. write away, butthead and I'll read what you got.

Awwww yeah,
Av


To: AvrilRulzToeTaLee@aol.com
From: TheAdwiz@aol.com
Subject: Re: Dude
Date: July 22, 2003

Here goes. I think we should call the song "Being Sad (Is So Bad)."

Life is sad
when you're dumped
Life is bad
when you're jumped
from behind and your heart is taken
Mmmm, mmm, bakin'
cookies.

Chorus:
Liiiiiiiiiife is sad
It could be
Life is sad
and then you're mad

I don't have a date
I haven't lost enough weight
I am all alone
I need an ice cream cone
Yeah, life is bad
when you're sad, mad and never glad

Chorus:
Liiiiiiiiiife is sad
It could be
Life is sad
and then you're had

(Guitar solo - you should shout here something like "GUITAR!" Make it growl)

You never call anymore
And ask me how I am
Forget ice cream, I just want to jam
And jam I will with my band
I play guitar with my hand
And I forget all about you

Chorus:
Liiiiiiiiiife is sad
It could be
Life is sad
and then you're his fad

So what do you think? Are you into it? I think you would sound perfect screaming out these angsty words. There's so much Kurt Cobain-like potential here. I'm psyched about this.

Best,
A

To: TheAdwiz@aol.com
From: AvrilRulzToeTaLee@aol.com
Subject: YAY!
Date: July 22, 2003

Wow. I am blown away. perfect. Now i just need someone to write music to it.
Thanks so much. this is going ot be great. i love you, Arye. let's meet up soon and buy stuff at the mall.

Love,
Av

PS who is curt Kobain?