GRAMMYS ROUND-UP

Kanye West really thinks he is indeed Jesus. The rapping newcomer from Chicago truly looks in the mirror and sees the son of Mary. Which is totally wrong because he's neither Jewish nor James Caviezel.

John Mayer wins a Grammy for "Daughters" which doesn't seem really fair considering he was already nominated for the same song last year. But only then it was called "Your Body Is A Wonderland."

Melissa Etheridge; thank you for the nightmares I will now have tonight.

Loretta Lynne is someone's grandmother.

Janis Joplin wins the Lifetime Acheivement Award after having been dead for over twenty years. Shouldn't they be honoring someone who actually had a lifetime?

When did Queen Latifah become a jazz singer? And could Da Brat pull of this transition as seamlessly?

When did we forget that James Brown is a convicted wife beater?

I'm only answering this question one more time: no, Gary Sinise and Anthony LaPalgia are not musicians.

"Across the Universe." Pronounced dead at 10:43 PM. Cause of Death: Butchering.

Sheryl Crow needs to put some clothes on because her body is just....like, weird.

The President of the Grammy Association just walked up to the microphone....and now I'm watching the Family Guy.