Tuesday, June 10, 2003

- The other day, my brother-in-law asked me, if you use the same towel every day after you shower AND you're definetely always clean when you get out of that shower, then why do you have to put that towel in the laundry?
I'm not sure, I said back.
A ha, he said.

Living History
By Hillary Clinton

Granted a picture is worth a thousand words but is a book worth $8 million? That's a good question considering Hillary Clinton's new memoir, LIVING HISTORY, will probably never make it to my night stand reading pile. I'm just not that interested in her story. I mean, wasn't she at home in the kitchen the whole time making dinner? It's not like she saw anything of interest.
Fun fact: did you know that I am only one degree away from the ex-First Lady? My mom met her once at a school function and my mom says--this is all true because I have the picture to prove it--that Hillary seems "like a smart woman." I know. Absolutely incredible. i was like, are you serious?
Incidentally, my mom also met Bill Clinton and we have a picture of that, too. I remember thinking, when I saw the picture, Ok, Billy, where are your hands? Hmmm...there's the right one...and.....let's see...whew, ok, there's the left one. Good Billy.
In truth, I think the reason Hillary makes me so uncomfortable is because she just seems like someone who could be a principal in a Yeshivah elementary school. I can so see her yelling, OK, NO RUNNING IN THE HALLS, PLEASE. And on occasion, I would be sitting outside her office, waiting for her to call me in and I'd be really nervous because she would definetely call home. And she would be on the phone and she would TOTALLY make small talk first like, so, how's everything at home, Mrs. Dworken? Wonderful. Yes...yes. No, things are going well with Bill. Ha ha ha....yes, I see. Well, that's good to hear but the reason I'm calling is because your son beat up his math teacher.

More: Mrs. Clinton did a signing yesterday at Barnes & Noble on Fifth Avenue. Seriously, for a really long time, I thought it was Barnes & NobleS. Plural on both names. But one day I actually looked at the sign and discovered, gee, I guess it's just "Noble." I guess one Noble was enough while they still needed plenty of Barnes. I wonder why that's so...was Barne not pulling his weight?


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