Tuesday, November 30, 2004

THE RAIN FALLS, IT FALLS ON OUR HEADS, AND WE LET IT.

He walked up the stairs from the subway. He was a bit buzzed from the bottle of wine he had just finished with a friend, which he was pleased with. He always thought that sharing a bottle with a friend is one of the truer pleasures still available to him in this world. That and smelling the wood burning in a fireplace.
It was raining out. Not a heavy rain but a mere drizzle not even worthy of an opened umbrella. It felt okay as the little drops of water gently hit his face. He felt like he was having 'a moment' like he's seen actors have in movies when they felt liberated or cleansed. Pela's song 'Latitudes' was playing in his ears and he thought no song could be more appropriate for right now. Perhaps Coldplay's 'Clocks' would have worked, he thought, but that is so cliché' I'm almost embarrassed for thinking it.

As he made his way down the block to his apartment, he closed his eyes. He wasn't sure why. It just seemed like a good idea. Every thing happening right now was to experience a moment...or rather, more appropriately, to assist the moment in happening correctly. As he walked into the slight refreshing drizzle, with his head tilted upwards, as the music played in his ears, he went elsewhere. He couldn't help but think of her. He sighed. Although, he didn't want to think of her, he did. As disappointed as he was in himself, he didn't think it worthy to fight his thoughts. We are like a photo album, he considered, and with every person we love, we meet, every friend we befriend...they become the pictures that fill us. Without them, we are just an empty album. And to continue in this metaphor, because he so loved metaphors, he wouldn't want to lose any the pictures forever. While he was still not ready to look at some of them, nevertheless, he wouldn't want to take them out of the album to tear them up or burn them or to leave them out in the street so someone could find them lying on the sidewalk near the garbage and wonder who those people are and do they miss this lost picture. Gosh, he would think, they sure do look happy.

This made him laugh. Sometimes photos can be so deceiving. They are literally moments caught in time and they have nothing to do with the present. Sometimes, he continued, they can almost contradict the present. Look at four months ago. Ha, he laughed again. Four months ago had nothing to do with now and now has nothing, absolutely nothing, zero, to do with four months ago. It frustrated him how the past only existed in the past. How he could not look into the pictures and wish that moment's return. It's my moment, he argued. Shouldn't I have the flexibility to re-experience it whenever I please?

He continued down the street with his eyes still closed. In his tipsy condition, the unknowing made him both slightly nervous and excited but he would not open his eyes just yet because the moment must continue. Yes, he thought. For the moment! Then he began to think of others and wonder about them, as well. He regretted the unnecessary friction he experienced with some. He even regretted the tensions that existed for significant reason but reality dictated that those tensions were still necessary so he would let them be. Sometimes he had to wait for hours, months, days, or years for those conflicts to subside. He wished he didn't miss people. He once had a friend that would always say I don't miss anyone. He never believed the friend because, really, how was that possible? You had to miss someone at some point?
But then he spent a few weeks overseas with that friend and never did he hear Friend express any longing. Maybe it was possible. Maybe he truly didn't miss anyone. And could I be like that?

He finally opened his eyes, standing right before his apartment building. He walked towards the door and his doorman opened it for him.
'How's it going," the doorman asked.
"Everything is great,' he said back.

And with this, his moment was over.

9 Comments:

Blogger alena said...

Hey, I have enjoyed...your blog is informative - even entertaining.

I have a halloween sites. They pretty much covers costumes and masks related stuff.

Thanks again and I'll be sure to bookmark you.

4:03 PM  
Blogger Tom Naka said...

Hi, I was just blog surfing and found you! If you are interested, go see my health maryland wellness
related site. It pretty much covers health maryland wellness
stuff. I guess you may find something of interest.

9:26 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hey, you have a great blog here!

I have a online pc repair site. It pretty much covers ##PC Repair## related stuff.

Come and check it out if you get time.

10:15 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Nice job on your blog! I am book marking your site for future reference.

I have recently created a cell phone headset
site. It pretty much covers cell phone headset
related stuff.

Stop by and check it out if you have time.

6:07 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I love your site.

I can help people who plan to move to San Diego save $5,000 to $25,000 on the purchase of their next home by negotiating with the seller. real estate law real estate law

Come and check my website out if you get time :-)

6:35 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

This is a good post. I have a site about wisconsin real estate please look at it if you can.

8:29 AM  
Blogger NewhampshireMan12 said...

Desktop Clock

2:19 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Great Blog! I also have a site about holiday m m chocolate chip cookie recipes
. You can check it out at holiday m m chocolate chip cookie recipes


Also, as a thank you for visiting my site, I'd like to tell you about a great site that is giving away a FREE DVD Camcorder! Just click the following link and enter your Zipcode to see if the promotion is available in your area!

FREE DVD Camcorder

7:14 AM  
Blogger Johnny said...

Just visited your blog, It is interesting to read. If you need some free cell phone tips, please click here .

2:05 AM  

Post a Comment

<< Home