Wednesday, December 20, 2006

BBS PINUP GALLERY

To coincide with Gawker's newly launched Pinup Gallery, BBS is getting in on the all-male action by posting the pinup below. Granted, I look slightly learning-disabled and it is by no means a flattering pic (but then again, when you look as Jewy as I do, not many of them are) but if you can't laugh at yourself, then why not have everyone laugh at you on on a high-traffic website.

Jewcy Magazine Launch @ Ars Nova Penthouse

Step 1: Print photo out. In color, for accuracy. In black and white, if you want to be "arty."
Step 2: Open your office supplies drawer.
Step 3: Take out tape; duct, masking, electric, or whatever.
Step 4: Hold Arye pinup to the wall.
Step 5: Rip pieces of tape; duct, masking, electric or whatever. Yes, Scotch tape is good too.
Step 6: Tape Arye to your wall.
Step 7: Stare at Arye a) longingly, b) pity him because, well, let's be honest, he looks really Corky in this pic, c) ask yourself what he's wearing right now (FYI: jeans and a black T shirt), d) what beer is Arye drinking in this picture because it doesn't look like the regular, cheap domestic beer he usually drinks, the cheap bastard, or e) wonder aloud whether someone this Jewish-looking should be allowed to wear flannel. I mean, isn't flannel like for the Gentiles?
Step 8. Take it down a couple of days later because you're not getting any work done knowing that Arye is staring at you like that and frankly, it's creeping you out.

Optional: Your local Kinko's or Staples will blow the First BBS Pinup up for you if you'd like yours poster-size, or even larger (why restrict yourself with a poster-size? Have you heard of wall-to-wall?). While there is a charge for this service, they may look at the picture and feel bad enough for the photo's subject and do it for free. Don't be surprised if the girl behind the counter puts her hand on yours and reassures you that everything is going to be all right. Nod and say, thank you.


Write Gawker at tips@gawker.com and tell them that you demand more flattering shots of Arye Dworken on their website. Tell them you want them posted now. Oh, but also tell them he's not doing any topless shots. He won't do 'em. It's in his contract.

2 Comments:

Blogger Shana said...

You're so cute- and funny too! I love this pic!

5:46 PM  
Anonymous Naomi said...

nice face.

11:55 AM  

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