Thursday, March 10, 2005

BRING BACK SINCERITY'S EXCLUSIVE INTERVIEW WITH SARCASTIC

BBS: Welcome, Sarcastic. We're very pleased to have you here.
Sarcastic: Yeah. Sure you are.
BBS: No, really. We are.
S: No, I know you are.
BBS: Oh. You weren't being sarcastic.
S: Nope.
BBS: How does it feel to be interviewed by Sincerity, essentially the opposite of sarcasm?
S: Like I would know.
BBS: There's no need to be sarcastic all the time, you know.
S: Yeah, sure there isn't.
BBS: What is the first documented account of sarcasm?
S: Like I would know.
BBS: Oh. Okay. Sorry for asking.
S: No, I was being serious. I actually know.
BBS: Oh, I thought you were being sarcastic again.
S: Well, the first time anybody was sarcastic was Cain and Abel when God spoke to Cain and asked him where his brother. And he says, like am I my brother's keeper?
BBS: Interesting.
S: Yeah, it seems like sarcasm has been around for a long time.
BBS: Even though we are generally sincere, I feel like BBS can be sarcastic from time to time.
S: Wow, that is so fascinating.
BBS: Really? Oh. You were being sarcastic again. Do you ever get tired of being Sarcastic?
S: Do you get tired of being Sincerity?
BBS: Well, sometimes I'm up late at night and I think, wouldn't it be nice to not be sincere all the time and just like, be me. You know? Let it all hang out.
S: That's deep.
BBS: Really? Dang. You got me again.
S: In fact, this is one of the most incredible conversations I've ever had.
BBS: Do you feel like there are times when you're not being Sarcastic but people still think you are?
S: Nope.
BBS: Ah ha. What's your favorite ice cream flavor?
S: That's a brilliant question.
BBS: Hmmm. What are your thoughts on Democracy in Iraq?
S: Anything that gets them closer to having Starbucks.
BBS: Do you like reading?
S: Nope. I have eyes but I don't actually use them.
BBS: Huh?
S: Are we almost done here because I don't have anywhere else to go.
BBS: You don't? I thought you said you had a lunch with your agent.
S: You just don't get this sarcasm thing, do you?
BBS: I guess not.
S: It's because you're so brilliant.
BBS: That's really sweet of you to...oh. I got it. Okay, I think we're done here, Sarcastic.
S: Can we go on a little longer? Please? Seriously. I haven't enjoyed myself this much in ages.
BBS: Sarcastic, thanks for joining Bring Back Sincerity. Join us next time when we interview Al Roker.
S: That should be fascinating.
BBS: That's enough out of you.
S: Okay.

0 Comments:

Post a Comment

<< Home